Welp, it’s official. I can’t do it.
And by that, I mean I’ve been kicked off the ‘fun’ train of exploring sex with strangers.
This is technically no surprise; I’ve always been that way. I’m not that type of person who gets a kick out of having flings and sexting random people online that I have no connection with. But since discovering my bisexuality, I have realized even more that I’m truly a demisexual.
I have joined the Kik app a while back because I had a couple of women from Cafemom there that needed chat buddies. Of course, they were from sexual type groups, so quite obviously, I knew they’d be some sexual talk involved. I didn’t mind that. What I DIDN’T expect was for them to be so overly fucking horny that they’d actually pressure me into sharing pictures of myself. Nude pictures of myself.
I didn’t know how bad it was out there. The groups are full of alternative thinking moms, lesbian moms, and bisexual moms. I didn’t know how serious the sexting world was until I stepped into that arena and got bombarded by ladies private messaging me and trying to get me to show myself. I thought these things would take time. If anything, i thought that this would be a group effort or group pressure. But nope. Some of the ladies talk to me privately and within minutes of meeting them, they’re flashing me a titty pic or their flat asses in a thong.
Like I said, obviously, I kind of expected this stuff, even though this was my first time in that sexting world. But I didn’t expect the ladies to show their stuff so soon and beg me to to it also. I mean, literally beg. One lady was seriously fucking coaxing me into showing her an ass pic, even after I told her a couple of times that I wasn’t comfortable with it. Like, damn, why are they so desperate? Isn’t sharing porn pics enough? Apparently, it wasn’t enough. They want to see YOU. Is that supposed to make it seem more genuine?
Of course, hubby knew that I was trying out these sexy Kik groups, and he was semi-okay with it as long as I didn’t show any nude pics. But I honestly had no desire to show myself, anyway. I can’t get that intimate with someone until we’ve established a relationship. My mind won’t let me do it. I don’t just throw my naked bits out there to the internet. Who knows if these women are even women at all? Hell, you never know these days. Could be transwomen. Could be men trying to see these pics. I trust nothing.
I love talking about sex like anyone else, but I don’t like the feeling of being pressured into showing myself. If I’m not doing it, I’m not doing it. That should be the end of it. But I should have known better. I know this world and how people react sexually. If they’re showing something, they want something in return, even though I never actually asked for any nudes from them. They just… shower one another with it.
So for now, I’m in the process of weeding myself out of some of these toxic groups. I can’t deal with the pressure. It’s nice seeing the daily tit, ass, and pussy pics (most of which aren’t even attractive enough for me, sad to say LOL), but I still have some morals. One of which don’t include showing nude pics to goddamn strangers.
Only someone who loves me and cares for me deserves to see me naked. And even though I feel like a damn prude for it, I’m a happy prude and I’ll stay that way. 😉