Being a Mom…

I love being a mom. It’s one of the most challenging jobs in the world. There is no instruction manual, there are no rules, no requirements, no restrictions. Well, except for hopefully you should know not to smash your kid’s head against a rock (compliments of the almighty Bible >_>) or toss them head first out the window if they throw a tantrum.

You’ve just got a squirming, little human in your arms and you’re not quite sure what to do with it or how they’ll turn out in life if you do something wrong.

I say that like I only have one kid. I surely don’t. I have FIVE. I’m pretty sure I am way on expert level as far as parenting. The kid’s ages are 7,6,4,2, and 4 months right now. Yep. Pretty much back to back. It wasn’t entirely planned that way, but we wanted them close in age anyway. So there ya go.

I remember back when hubby and I were dating, we often discussed how many kids we wanted and our plans for them. We wanted to homeschool if possible. Looking back at that, we really got what we wanted, even down to the genders of our children. Girl, boy, girl, boy, girl. Don’t ask me how that shit happened; I don’t know. It just did. LOL

We’ve had some pretty fierce financial knocks so far not only because we had so many kids so quickly, but because of the issues that stemmed from my abuse. I was dealing with PTSD, chronic depression and anxiety when we married, and still dealing with it now. But at the time, I had no choice to get married when I did. We were in love, but not ready for marriage. So that sucked entirely, but hell; I’m just happy that it was with the right man. 

Even through all that we’ve been through so far, I still don’t regret my kids. I’ve always wanted a lot and I got just what I desired. My kids often made up for all the pain and suffering that I’d had prior to having them, having them be born healthy and strong (unmedicated births), seeing their little smiles, being able to be home and teach them, tickling them until they can’t breathe.

Being a mom has made me stronger. In some ways, I’ll never know exactly HOW strong having my five kiddos has made me. But it doesn’t fucking matter. I am PROUD to be a mom and I won’t ever again let anyone belittle me because of it.

You already know that having a lot of kids in this economy isn’t ‘socially acceptable’. That’s okay. Because whereas I hear a lot of older people regret not having enough kids because they were too busy chasing dollars, I’ll be sitting back not regretting a dayum thing.

That’s exactly where I love to be. 🙂

~Epic Realist~


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